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Back in the early months of this year i'm sure a few of you will remember me rambling on about this band. I fell in love. Generally speaking fairly poorly written emo acoustic (and to me THIS is emo and what its about) thats not made to be the next award winning masterpiece, but, more music to be pained by? Or with? I know that doesn't sound good, but, it works when you're low. And at the time i was very much so. The lyrics aren't really what's important here, the point being the songs off the album (Broken Summer) were just about sharing something a bit deeper, knowing you weren't the only one out there. With this song specifically, i found myself angressively singing along at the end every time. The idea of being able to hurt him back filed me with fantastic levels of emotion that were such a great change from sadness, and the idea he might ever have to relate to them was just, well, it felt good. I won't bother telling you who it was aimed at, but i think many of you know who he is...
"I did nothing at all, nothing at all, it's all my fault you're gone"
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Following on from the place in my life of the last, i played this song on repeat for litereally hours. It just felt like it was me in there. In the song. It's funny, a couple of years ago, i couldn't relate to music. It's so cool being able to now, and so much more. I won't go into any more detail other than to say thankyou Lindsey for waking me up =)
But yes, shockingly, this song is about suicide (at least it is to me, heh) and was just basically the soundtrack to my low point of the year. The best part is, unlike Goodbye (I'm Sorry) - ...And Then I Turned Seven... & The Day That i Die - Good Charlotte i can listen to this song now and feel that i've grown. Our past makes us who we are, no matter how much we don't want it to.
"Everyone i know has got a reason, to say, put the past away"
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I wish they weren't such a big part of my year, but at the same time it led me to listen to a lot of very awesome music lots and lots :P I never listened to this song with the story/message intended. To me it was just, my way of trying to accept the idea of Lindsey and Chris as a couple, and, it was hard. Lets be honest it still is. I can't help that, it's the way i feel. I don't believe feelings can be "wrong" (Except mike's incestual ones :P) and it's just another thing to accept. This song comes from a very good album, Chariot, which i fell in love with this year. It would be sitting in my top 5 albums of the year if i'd actually done one. All the songs are just so well written and are very emotive. Assuming i've used the word right! I'd look it up but i'm so not that bothered, you know what i mean. Good time to stop.
"Why weren't you true? You know i trusted you, when you were just friends..."
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I'm not sure how my musical tastes would've panned out without this band. They're fucking amazing. After listening to the tracks available at the time on Purevolume i ordered the album (Take This To Your Grave) as soon as i could. But this was always my first and foremost love off it. It always reminded me of that feeling of being the better man? Not in a cocky way, and not really even in a "he's a dickwad" way (note the mature insult), but it's just inevitable (hehe, i need to watch Team America again) that you feel that "GARGH why are you with him and not me?!" moment. Personally, this was my song for it for a while this year.
"You need him, i could be him, i could be an accident but i'm still trying, and that's more than i can say for him"
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Along with every one else, i heard this on the O.C, played for Caleb's funeral. When i became addicted to it though was in fact the day of the London Bombings. It's all i listened to. It summed up the pain, and the opening verse just summed up the shock and trauma that seemed to consume the country. Enough said.
Where are We? What the hell is going on?
The dust has only just begun to form, crop circles in the carpet.
Sinking feeling.
Spin me round again and rub my eyes, this can't be happening.
When busy streets a mess with people, would stop to hold their heads heavy.
There are of course dozens if not hundreds more songs that really moved me this year, that have helped me become more of who i am today. However, i haven't got the time (nor webspace!) to go into all those. I realise that there's a great focus on negative emotions in this post, but, to be hounest, that's been my year's main focus. No it hasn't all sucked, but i'm sitting here alone at 11:45pm on New Years Eve. I'll leave you with my New Years song though.
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"You tell yourself, what you want to hear, caus' you have to believe, this will be my year"